Do I Dance Like Elaine?

I love social dancing.  Sometimes called partner dancing, it means that I am dancing with a man who is leading the dance.  As long as I can keep track of what count my feet are supposed to be on, I don’t have to think, I’m just reacting to his cues.  The rule is that it is the “lead’s” responsibility to send solid cues to the “follow”.  If she screws up, it’s his fault for not leading well.

Salsa, swing and ballroom are all examples of social dancing.

Social dancing can burn off about 365 calories an hour depending on your weight and dance partner.  If I want a great workout, I dance with Ben or William.  It’s like attending an aerobics class wearing heels. Dewey and Eddie are outstanding dancers, and not quite as intense. They help me warm up or cool down, or just take a break when I am getting so sweaty that even the fellas are getting creeped out.

There is a myth that I am a good dancer.  Eddie and Dewey can explode that myth, as I have scuffed their shoes more than once.  Regardless of the afore mentioned rule, I know it is my fault for losing track of my feet.  I am a fairly good follower typically, and fortunately that covers a multitude of sins.  What I do not like to do is what is typically called “nightclub dancing.”

Shaking my ass and waving my arms… I always get the image of Elaine on Seinfeld when she decides to “get the party started.”

Good heavens. Do I look like this?

She thinks she is an AWESOME dancer and the fact that everyone in the room is staring at her confirms this belief.  Of course, when we look at the faces of her audience, we can easily see that they are both horrified and amused by the spectacle she is making of herself.  If you haven’t seen it:

The second that image enters my head, I’m as awkward as a nun in a strip club.  I look around the dance floor and see these women who move almost instinctively to the music.  These are cool women, comfortable in their own bodies and oblivious to everyone else in the room. At least that is what I imagine.  Who knows?  Maybe they practice for hours in front of the mirror so they can appear that way.  Maybe they are stoned to oblivion, or on the 4th martini.  I have no idea, but they look good on the dance floor.  I envy them.

That’s a pretty good metaphor for many aspects of my life.  I think it would be awesome to have an instant replay on certain events in my past to see what it looked/sounded like to everyone else in the room.  Sometimes I have been amazed when I have heard others tell me how they remembered a particular conversation.  It is so drastically different than what’s in my head, I truly wish I had a video playback to see what really happened.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could do that?  What a great learning experience!  Even better; get actors to replay the exact scene word for word with the same body language and voice intonation.  Would I think differently of the situation if I saw it happening with other people?  The best I can do is imagine someone else explaining the events to me; if I weren’t so attached to it, would I feel differently?

For now I’m sticking to social dancing.  If I look bad, it’s HIS fault.

My book, Dating, Sex, & Jesus is now available at Please “like” the Dating, Sex, & Jesus Facebook page at: for fun and interesting content and book excerpts in your feed. Thanks!


About howhardcoulditbe

While this started as a chronicle of my many (sometimes ill-conceived) "Do It Yourself" projects, it has morphed into a journal of my 9-year journey as a single Christian woman striving to live by God's design.
This entry was posted in personal growth and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Do I Dance Like Elaine?

  1. Dewey says:

    I think some people don’t listen to what they are saying, at all. I try to, but I have caught myself saying things using the wrong words or wrong tone and managed to embarrass myself. I’M shocked and I heard it come out of my mouth, so what must those around me think who don’t realize that isn’t how it was intended to come out? Ooops. But how many times have we said things poorly that we DIDN’T notice or catch? Hard to tell. Need that playback to double check.

    (And you don’t dance like Elaine.)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s